This is one thing that you can not afford to miss. As soon as you finish reading this i bet you would be in a state of confusion as well as frustration. Your fundamental identity will come under question and you will soon find yourself questioning and seeking the ultimate truth.

Ok, ok, lets make it clear. If you are not one of those software engineers or mba students, then from the next time onwards start reading my blog from 3rd paragraph as the first two are solely serving the purpose of keeping the above mentioned creme de la creme busy.

*** Start of the Age old theory of age ***

Today, my classmate Potti is standing outside the mess after the copious lunch and chatting with us. Suddenly out of blue, Potti proceeded to ask people a very simple question. That is,

“What is your age?”

everybody naturally replied a number slightly above 20 and not more than 25. Potti with the look of “cruel teacher who is enjoying while his wards are making mistakes” on his face stood there for quite sometime before the ultimate revelations came out.

He said,

“We all are more than a billion years old”

We all started laughing out loud and shouting at him. He then proceeded to say,



“… What is our body? It is built up with atoms. atoms of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, maruti zen(i swear i am not making this up!!!). And where are these atoms coming from??, they are here for billions of years. We are nothing but these very atoms. And thus we are more than a billion years old.”



We don’t know what to say. Suddenly we all are thinking. Well, despite the fact that *thinking* is a rare feat for worm bodies having managers inside them, we did think. After the initial hue and cry over the theory which rocked the fundamental premises of life we all decided that we need to reward the great philosopher among us.

One of us suggested that we need to celebrate Potti’s ‘One Billionth Birthday’. And being the birthday it is, we have to follow the formal procedure laid out by the seniors when celebrating it.

we have to literally throw potti one billion times into the air and catch him the same number of times and then we all should vigorously add the spare atoms on our footwear to potti’s A$$.

Owing to the lack of time and considering the importance of the ‘national income calculations’ (people also call it Macroeconomics class) due in another 15 minutes we have decided to give *only* bumps to Potti…

*** End of the Age old theory of age ***

Implications of Age old theory of age:

come to think of it!!!. It will just change the meanings of everything we have ever known. Some of the things which i can think of are,

- With a shade of luck and spare fat, you can become older than anyone ever lived in your entire family tree. Both upwards and downwards that is.

- Momentary farting in classrooms is actually making you young and thus immature. So, keep your mouth shut in classrooms.

* you can always put in the contributions in the comments. Who knows ? You can be the next person to comeup with a path breaking theory like this !!!

Current Y! status says: Open for Visitors !!!

• 1 Comment

Three things..

(1)

I am reading “Dilbert Principle” by Scott Adams. Simply put, awesome book. All the idiocies in work life of 90% of the population are explained with the help of the simple theory that “people are idiots”. Most of the time i was thinking about my earlier work place and laughing out loud. Add to that the dilbert strips thrown in the book are too good.

(2)

I have seen or rather finished watching “Finding Nemo” yesterday night. Great movie it is. The story of small clown fish called Nemo. The good thing about animation movies is that they give you true entertainment by taking you to a different world. We see movies in which companies fight, nations fight and even individuals fight. This is pretty much here outside the movie theatre also. No point wasting time on that :P. Some of the suggestions to bring reality back to your life,

- Ice Age

- Toy Story

- Antz

- Finding Nemo

- Tom & Jerry

(3)

Today I have debate on “Outsourcing - the source of urban illetarate”. I am to speak against the topic. Gathering info on it. Hope it goes peacefully

Chalo den, time for another maharaja dose of macro-economics.

Current Y! status says: Defy Convention - Sleep in the nights

• 2 Comments

Ravan, Standing tall he is

The leg team that is

Men at work

Raw Material Processing Department

Torturing my sidey, Yours truly

Current Y! status says: Ideas for Torture # 01: Make sure that the case uses 8pt Times New Roman font with single spacing and no borders and runs into 24 pages

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Introduction:

This analysis primarily focuses on how to make decision with regards to location and capacity of sleep. The article aims to clarify some of the pressing doubts of the MBA participants spread across the world of which a majority is, I believe, sleeping now and the rest I presume or either trying to make the critical operations decision or reading this blog to gain the essential gyaan.

Now that the base has been established, lets move ahead and see the cost-benefit analysis of the various Locations for sleep and maximum possible Capacities at each location.

Option 1:

“Regular Ramu”:

This option behaves like a clock or time table or for that matter subodh in DCH. Well, you don’t have to make any capacity decisions or location decisions in this option. All you have to do is sleep at a regular time no matter what. And sleeping location is your Room and only your room.

Benefits:

- You don’t look like a hen which is escaping from its master who inturn is waiting for a nice tandoori chicken the next day.

- You don’t stink

- You don’t have problems like constipation/ attention(??)/ fatigue.

- No pains of sitting through endless and hopeless group meetings to decide things like what should be the file name of the final report for the marketing group presentation 1 or what is the number of characters each member should type in the one page report for OM.

Costs:

- You never know what you are going to miss

- Your sideys hate you BIGTIME

- You cant expect to work in a different timezone. Simply put, no foreign placements for you.
- You will be labeled as free rider sooner or later.

Option 2:

“Classroom Kamu”

This option behaves exactly opposite to Ramu discussed earlier. Persons pursuing this path to sleep can be found in acad block more often. The basic problem with these people is not “lack of sleep”. But it is their strange nature to fell asleep for voice stimulations. Studies are done to see whether these people sleep in hostels if they are made to watch a virtual class. The results are…. Leave it, its anybodys guess.

Benefits:

- More time at disposal. You can do all that you ever wanted in your life with that time. Things like, watching all the porn on the LAN, giving b’day bumps to all the 240 souls in the class or for that matter what ever is the number, preparing for the next days class (???), writing blogs, networking, reading stupid stuff (???) and the list goes on.

- You are always on the top of situation. Whether it is group meeting or hot gossip or free treat at canteen. You are there.

- You get most of the airtime in meetings. Since most of the members turn out to be not so KAMUish, you get to have a snoring audience to listen your spiel on how to market Benz cars in china kara agraharam.

Costs:

- You stink. You hardly get any time to brush your teeth. Forget the bathing part.

- You might end up having back pain.

- You might suffer from other forms oral sleep stimulants like, guest lectures, batch meetings.

- If by gods grace and some luck, if all your group members are KAMUs, you will end up spending time on discussing who should start the discussion for days and months to come.

Mixed Options - 1:

“Napping Nagu”

Well, these people sleep for 2-3 hours in the night in their beds and another 2-3 hours in the afternoon no matter where. Most of the B- schoolers argue that this is the best of the both worlds. You get adequate sleep yet manage to make sure that you don’t miss any thing.

Benefits:

- You will feel energetic at most parts of the day

- You get medium work load and maximum fun

- with little planning you can actually squeeze more sleep that the above two sleeper classes

Costs:

- You might be missing the important filling elements (snacks and dinner) of the day due to unplanned sleep. Surveys have always confirmed that most of the budding managers survive on snacks and dinner only.

- You are in a fix if there are one too many guest lectures

- You always get D or C grade in Quizzes. Not that you can get an F. But yeah, it depends on your potential.

Mixed Options - 2:

“foreigners Faltu”

This option behaves like a foreigner. He/she following the option try to sleep from 2pm to 10pm. God forbid if there is any quiz they write it and sleep till 11pm. Later they don’t sleep in classes (or may be they do, after all sleep is something which cannot be determined using kurtosis or cognitive dissonance or for that matter lambda).

Benefits:

- You sleep when most others are wasting their time preparing for classes or getting bogged in group meetings.

- You gain maximum fun in class by following every single CP

- You can work in foreign locations, even if it is Sahara or Panama.

- you generally don’t stink in classes

Costs:

- You loose weight and become skinny sooner or later.

- You are labeled as sucker. Because when most of your group members are sleeping you try to solve the case or write the report all alone.

- You end up labeled as ghissu.

References:

1. Operations and Prod. Management - J Martinitch

Current Y! status says: Mission Statement: Long awkward statement that demonstrates management’s inability to think clearly

• 2 Comments

I am not talking about age here. I am talking about something very near to age. it it TIME.

yeah, today we have a BTO class at 9:30. And the prof. closed the room at 9:29. and know what, 50% of the junta missed the class. It hurts really when we miss class like this. Moreover, this one class carries a weightage of 12% if there is a surpise quiz and 7% otherwise. Alas, there i get my D in this.

BTO has always been my fav. class. The prof. gives some really fundu insights in the class. He makes most of think. Well, people confuse between thinks and stinks and most of the time we get this high quality stinking CP. that is because of the 40% grades attached to Class Participation in this course.
Also, if anyone misses 3 classes of BTO, he/she can pack his bags and leave this place. I guess i need to book an apex ticket now itself
chalo, this way i am gonna get late for marketing class too. Catch ya later.

Bye,

Chandoo

Current Y! status says: Ideas for Torture # 23: Macro dosage of Macro.

• 0 Comments

Well, I agree that i havent posted a word for the last what …. days. Here goes a list of items i have done/doing in the last 16 days (not necessarily in the same order). Hope to blog more often

- Seen ‘Hyderabad blues’

- Had 12 days of non-stop classes

- had fin-1 quiz

- seen ‘Toy Story’

- designing cartoons for IRIS

- became a participant co-ordinator in IRIS for 3 skools (IIM L, NMIMS and MICA)

- designed some crappy animation for IRIS

- submitted the case analysis for entrepid

- gave a presentation on Gramophone India in marketing class (well, i was just standing there, our group did it :P)

- found myself interested in marketing

- watched ‘the terminal’

- had been to dandiya party

- tasted three sips of Vodka.
- had my b’day celebrated on 20th.

- got first ever b’day bumps on my virgin a$$.

- took a major shower after the exuberant junta poured tea/ lassi/ pepsi/ sprite/ eggs/ water into my hair

- seen ‘ice age’

- wrote big time global in first 2 marketing quizzes

- got my grades (5 of them) for the term1. B in HBW, QT, MAC, CT and C in BTO

- got my first quiz of BTO II results. Not bad after all.

- havent washed my clothes in last 2 weeks

- had been to city with IN-FORM the media team of IRIS on dinner

- participated in one round of i-rising.

- found that FIN is not worth investing my working capital
- seen ‘the great escape’

That is all for now.

Current Y! status says: http://iimi-iris.com/about/index.html?a=nostralgia.html

• 1 Comment

Classes will begin for the term 2 in another 40 mins.
well, today we have fin, accounting and bto2 sessions. Should be an interesting day for the one who has prepapred for the classes. Thanks largely to the vacation, i got lazy and havent completed the reading assignments for BTO2. It seems i am going to start the term with global stuff :D:D

Otherwise, last two days had been really good. I have seen 3 movies. Iceage, Phonebooth and Great Escape. Awesome movies.

Anyway that is all for now. Bye and goodday.

Current Y! status says: Invisible to everyone

• 2 Comments